Years ago, my sons were in a private school. I put them in there because I had always loved school and wanted them to have the same experiences I had. I soon realized that my son had issues with socializing. I pulled him out and homeschooled him for a year. Determined that he would have a "normal" school upbringing, I put him back into school. Still struggling, I pulled him out again. I began to realize that the life I wanted for my child was just that; it was what "I" wanted. At that moment, I realized that God had called me to homeschool my kids, and since then, I have never looked back.
Recently, my husband and I had decided that now that the kids are older, I should maybe look for a part-time job. In the past I have had jobs, but usually my kids are always with me, since I usually worked in daycares. Deciding this was what was right for our family, I submitted my resume. Not long after I got a call. After the call, I got an interview, and after that I got the job. Praying that this was right, I had made a list of things that I had to have. First I wanted Sundays and Wednesdays off for church, and second, I needed to work nights, since I homeschool during the day. The future employer accepted these requests and I started my new job journey. Thinking that God had opened all these doors for me, I just knew this must be what He had for me, and I went in with high expectations and excitement that I would succeed! Between the time that I sent in my resume, to the time that I began working, problems began to arise. First, we started having car problems. We had to take it in twice. Then the church began to call and ask me to be apart of different things. I had been trying to be involved in certain areas for years, and all of the sudden doors had opened up, and I had no time to be involved. Groups that I had once been in charge of, began to be pushed to the side, due to work conflict.
As the changes all took place over the course of three weeks, I finally sat down with my husband and began to realize that this perfect looking job, with all these open doors, was not God's plan at all for us! I had selfishly wanted my own agenda, and pushed until God said, "FINE", and gave me what I wanted. I may not have thrown tantrums, or whined that I needed a job, but I certainly did not consult God enough, and did not rely on Him to meet our needs. Realizing that this was not where God wanted me, I turned in my resignation, and will continue to stay at home with my children full time. The moment that God gave me clarity on my selfish and stubborn ways, I turned from them and asked for forgiveness.
Maybe you struggle with allowing God to lead you. It can be hard to allow God to have complete control of your life! Sure, it would be nice for us to have that income and not always feel like we are barely getting by, but I can also tell you that I have so much more faith than I ever had before. God has taken care of us in ways that may seem impossible, but He always swooped in and saved the day. We have never been without a home, food, car, or any of our basic needs. Through the years He has taken care of them all! I encourage you today to examine your life and make sure that you are following the path that God has for you. Set your pride and stubbornness aside and allow God to lead you into a path of blessing by honoring Him.
Isaiah 48:17 “...I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go."